Sick ramblings

I'm sick as a dog today. Why are dogs used as a reference point in that expression? I've seen my dog Kneehi throw up, bounce away to chase a squirrel, and when said squirrel has been thoroughly taught a lessen, return and eat what he left. Dogs are some of the least representative creatures of sickness on the planet. You don't hear them asking their masters to readjust their pillow or take their temperature or change the channel for them. I think the expression should be, "I'm as sick as Uncle Ted today". For those of you who don't know, my uncle Ted is an expert at playing sickness for all it's worth. Just ask his wife.

So, I'm as sick as Uncle Ted today. There's some kind of brain leach sucking at the inside of my forehead, my eyes keep wanting to twist to the right, and my lungs feel like they're trying to inhale that liquid oxygen stuff from The Abyss. You'll forgive me if I'm not making sense -- I can't tell.

You know, another animal used in exactly the wrong expression is the poor misunderstood pig. "I'm sweating like a pig" is terribly inaccurate, because pigs can't sweat. That's why they roll around in mud in hot weather. Some may find that pretty disgusting, but I'd rather fat guys do that in the summer than walk around sweating, making their own gravey.

Sorry. I'm sick, so you'll forgive me.

Okay, time to work, or at least attempt to. Kudos to Erica for the list of alternatives to the name wryspace. I should have gone with Haikuspace (sp?). Except I'd have to make all my entries 5 lines and be really gentle and like to rake rock gardens and be all in harmony with nature and stuff. Yuck. Guyspace - yeah, that's what I should've gone with. Except females would think they aren't allowed to read. That's no good. I'll suppose I'll just stick with having people think I'm funny.